The price THEY pay.

I talk a lot about me, my whole emotional history from childhood, about friends and outings, about family and acceptance and advocacy, but I never touched yet on the most important person in my life other than to mention some material gifts she's given me. Why not? Well, in a way I consider our relationship to be sacred ground. My wife has known about my transgenderism longer and in more detail than any single person in my life (actually more than everyone combined) and is the most affected by it, yet she has stood by me and continues to do so through adversity you cannot imagine. Even I cannot easily dissect the depth of her love or comprehend the sense of loss she must be feeling in light of recent events. All I can really say is this: The spouses of transgendered people suffer right along side them and pay a heavy price for their love. In many cases they feel they are losing someone they had their whole life invested in. In many cases we are asking them to change their sexual orientation. In many cases we get so wrapped up in ourselves that their needs are lost in the shuffle. We owe them our understanding and gratitude no matter how they must proceed with their own lives. I know I wouldn't want to walk even two steps in my wife's mocassins. Think about it.


To go with my new shooz

One of so many gifts from my sweet wife. I wouldn't have room here to put all the cute clothes she's given me and jewelry that she custom made for me. A girl couldn't ask for a better benefactor when it comes to accessorizing. Also, this purse goes with my already impressive collection that I had thanks to dear friend Julie the purse princess, the handmaiden of handbags, the connoisseur of clutches.


Happy Birthday Sis

To transition alone is a nightmarish proposition. The lucky among us can and do find advocates amongst their friends and family. Even though I did not begin my journey when I was young and afraid, I did know that I had that advocate in my little sister, and that fact did offer me some comfort over the years. She never knew I regarded her in that manner and I never told her about my TG status until just this year, but she reacted exactly as I expected, full of love and support only. Hope you had a wonderful birthday sis and I love you.


Yes, scrambled in the gulliver me droogs.

To clear some confusion, here is a link to the Nadsat dictionary: http://soomka.com/nadsat.html


Just noticed something!

That was not planned.......... OK, maybe it was.

An amusing story.

I was relating to my wife, the lovely Sweet Vee, a realization I had when talking to my headshrinker. I realized that I really am just a little girl in ways because I never got to be one, but longed for the little girl things, so in essence I'm starting from there. Anyway, I was telling the shrink that it really hit home with me when I was looking at the notebook I brought to take notes in and was overcome with the feeling that it needed stickers to be more pretty. The next day, Sweet Vee, bought me a bunch of Tinkerbell stickers and a Tinkerbell book (cause she knows I LUV Tinkerbell) Of course I promptly festooned my cell phone with the kewl stickers and my notebook, too. This picture above is from one of my favorite websites http://www.tinkfanatic.com/ , check it out if you're into Tink too. C'mon, I know you are, everybody luvs Tink!


What the hell is Kynni-Chemy?

Kynni-Chemy is the alchemy I apply to myself, Kyndra (Kynni), and as you may know alchemy is the ancient pursuit of changing lead into gold, transformation. I am in the process of transforming myself into someone a little more, someone who feels whole and complete, in a sense, golden. So who is Kyndra? Well I'm a lifetime TS who is late to bloom. I spent my life timid and afraid and have finally decided after nearly 40yrs. it is time to finally be me, or at least as much of me as I can achieve. This brings me to the picture posted with this introduction. You might look at this and see only sadness, but look closer. Yes, that little girl is alone and sad in a dark room, but a door has opened, a shaft of light is upon her and she can come out now. For me that little girl was decades in the dark room, but here I am now, the door has finally opened and I'm now skipping out into the light whenever I can!